And most recently, I was filled with it. Doubt. My last couple of runs leading up to my second marathon have not been good. Bad, even. The other day I failed to log my final 20 miler. 16 miles was the most I could muster (which I realize is OK, but I needed the comfort of something a little closer to 26.2). It was hot and humid. I was miserable and certain I should not show up for OKC in two weeks. But then I snapped out of it, said eff it, and realized I cannot do anything about a race that's weeks away. What I could do was focus on being positive and get my ass home without overdoing it and hurting myself.
Walking the final stretch of my route on Lake Highlands Drive, I was overwhelmed by the scent and sight of honeysuckles. It's hard to feel defeated when something so simple and sweet is thrown in your sweaty face. The flower's nectar is the official taste of spring (pull the stamen from the flower, lick, enjoy).
But there's only so much nature can do to keep my mind off the race. Fortunately, I have plenty of live music to enjoy. Spoon's show last week was awesome (not even Sundown's disappointing quinoa veggie burger could ruin the night). Yesterday, I was thrilled to see two excellent University of North Texas groups. Both the UNT Two O'Clock Steel Band (not a single dread-locked member!!!) and the One O'Clock Lab Jazz Band were dynamite (didn't see the Tuba Band, but I'm sure they were good, too). In particular, it's insane how talented the jazz band is. It was a real treat seeing them for free in my neighborhood — on the parking lot of Spec's, of all places — with an eclectic and appreciative crowd. College co-eds chilled as some of Dallas' elite watched from the comfort of their BENTLEY!!!
Sleigh Bells is this week (ear plugs will be necessary) and I will have the honor of playing my new banjo with the best elementary school choir in North Texas this week, too. These will keep me from worrying for a little while.